How’s the journey going?

will my journey leave prints?

I almost hated myself, when I realized that I almost lost my ODJ for the second time. ODJ, published by RBC ministry is my daily devotional book. Last three months I lost one, but by God’s grace I got another one. It turned out that one of my house maids kept it upstairs together with some old newspapers. Gazing to the cover, my eyes caught the verses written there. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek His will in all you do, and He will show you which path to take.” [Proverbs 3:5-6]. It really stroked me. But what’s more heart wrenching was when I read the editor’s note. Just a simple question and I was almost burst in tears. “How’s the journey going?” That simple question directed me to write this post.

A simple sharing to remind myself, that, it’s okay to get down as long as you remember to get up.

Lately, I have been in places where I have never been before. I’ve been to places where people talk about promiscuity life, and even live one. I’ve been to places where people spend their money like crazy, go and hang out ‘till they drop. I’ve been to places where people only do what they think right. But never, I‘ve been to this place, where I question God. For Christian, it might be a simple disaster. I question God, there, when I was sitting quietly listening to the Sunday sermon in my church. I remembered the passage delivered was about Jesus who resurrected Lazarus when he died. He said “I am the way and the Life whoever come to me will have eternal life”. Right at that very moment, when she read that verse, my mind travelled to a clip, played years ago, about Post-Modernism (I think). In the clip, there are several people stating about them selves. They claim to be the center of their life. And at the end, one by one, they say that they are the way, the truth and the life. Somehow, I realized how people can be The Way so easily. I want to have a better job, so I look for a better job. I want to build family, so I look for a potential spouse. I want to enjoy my life, so I look for travel brochure. I want to be prettier, so I look for cosmetics ads. I, I and I, always I. The center of this life is me. Everyone and everything should circle around me. This is when the question popped out. Where’s God? Is He merely on my ODJ and Joe Stowell’s books? Is there God in my life? Here’s where Facebook takes part.

Yes, you read correctly, Facebook. I figured almost the entire universe (of my life) know that I am a social network freak who regularly stalk on people. Recently, I installed a tweetdeck on my laptop. Using it, I can open all my three accounts of social networking in one page, they are twitter, Facebook and my space (if Friendster is on the list, I’ll log in too). I read someone’s status about somehow she can go to Maui paid by others (my guess is some investor or non-profit organization paid her trip). She wrote in her Facebook status a line long ago I heard from my sister; “Sometimes God must be joking”….sigh. It was hard for me to accept the fact how I work my ass off but still couldn’t do anything about my life because God is not allowing what I want to happen. I. Again, I. I just wrote 182 “I” (now it is 183) in this passage and only wrote 7 “God”, what a comparison! So the prayer is that in the next hours, after writing this post. One (me) should try to live a better life. Where there are more God that oneself (myself). This is simply because we need to trust in the Lord with all our heart; not depend on our own understanding. We should seek His will in all we do, and He will show us which path to take.

Let Him joke!